The LACOBA Twins Are At It Again!

 

In a cozy bar in Gulu, two slightly tipsy old-timers nursing their drinks, and a conversation so absurd it could only mean one thing—it's Opiyo Speed and Ocen Speed, the famous Laroo banter brothers, back in action.

Opiyo squints at Ocen over his beer, tilts his head, and drops the classic line, "You look familiar... where you from?" Ocen, not one to be outdone, responds with dramatic flair, "Gulu." Cue the first wave of astonishment. "No way, I'm from Gulu myself! What a small world!"

Then comes round two. "What area?" Opiyo probes. Ocen smirks, "Laroo." BAM! Another bombshell. "No way! Laroo myself! This is crazy!" They're bonding now, like long-lost soulmates reunited over a cheap lager.

The kicker? School. Opiyo leans in conspiratorially, "What school?" Ocen takes a sip, savors the moment, and proudly declares, "Layibi College. Class of '89." Opiyo's jaw practically hits the floor. "NO WAY! Layibi College Class of '89 myself! What are the odds?!"

Meanwhile, in walks a regular Lucia, OG Zoo zone, fresh from dodging Gulu's infamous boda bodas. She sidles up to the bartender, all casual-like, and asks, "Joe, anything interesting tonight?"

The bartender, seasoned in the art of deadpan delivery, glances at the pair of overgrown boys reliving their glory days and shrugs. "Not really... but the LACOBA twins are drunk again."

And there you have it—just another night at Gulu's finest drinking spot. Where the beer flows, the laughs are louder than the music, and the LACOBA twins remind us that the world is indeed very small.

Happy Holidays,

Don’t drink and drive.

Join Lacoba Today.

Cheers! 🍻

DISCLAIMER: NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUS. HOLIDAYS HUMOUR.

Squid Game 2 Returns: Ready, Set, Die!

Grab your jumpsuits and emotional support snacks—Squid Game is back! Netflix just dropped the first trailer for Season 2, and it's as wild as you'd expect. Player 456, Seong Gi-hun (Lee Jung-jae), is returning to the deadly playground, still traumatized but somehow ready for round two. This time, he's not just playing—he’s trying to save lives. Spoiler alert: good luck with that.

Season 1 had us glued to our screens as 456 desperate contestants risked it all (read: their lives) for a cash prize that would make Elon Musk jealous.Now, Gi-hun is joined by a new batch of equally broke players ready to gamble their lives for a shot at fortune. The stakes? Higher. The games? Deadlier. The trauma? Priceless.

The trailer throws us straight into the chaos with the OG nightmare: Red Light, Green Light. Yes, the creepy giant doll is back with her laser-sharp death stare. This time, one unlucky player loses to... a bee. Classic.

As in Season 1, the players get to vote on whether to quit or keep playing. Gi-hun pleads for sanity, but cash-starved contestants can’t resist the clinking sound of coins filling the giant piggy bank above them. Cue the ominous chants of, "One more game!"

Returning to the carnage are the sinister Front Man and undercover detective Hwang Jun-ho, alongside more games, more drama, and more ways to die creatively, as teased by director Hwang Dong-hyuk. Netflix hopes this season mirrors the record-breaking success of the first, which garnered 1.65 billion viewing hours and turned South Korean dramas into must-watch TV.

Squid Game Season 2 drops on December 26, 2024, just in time to ruin your holiday cheer. Oh, and Season 3? Mark your calendars for 2025. Until then, may the odds be ever in your favor. Or not.

 

Eddy Kenzo Wins Best East African Superstar 2024 at ODA Awards in Ethiopia.

Ugandan music icon Eddy Kenzo has once again raised the flag high, bagging the coveted Best East African Superstar 2024 award at the ODA Awards held in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. The prestigious event, which celebrates excellence in African music and arts, saw Kenzo standing out among some of the region's biggest names.

Kenzo’s win is a testament to his incredible journey and relentless dedication to his craft. Known for his infectious beats and uplifting lyrics, he has become a household name across the continent. Tracks like Sitya Loss and Tweyagale have not only dominated charts but also cemented his reputation as a global ambassador of Ugandan music.

At the glamorous ceremony, Kenzo expressed gratitude to his fans, team, and country for their unwavering support. "This is for Uganda. Thank you for believing in me," he said, radiating humility and pride.

Kenzo’s win highlights East Africa’s growing influence in the global music scene and inspires emerging artists in the region. As the first Ugandan artist to be nominated for a Grammy, this latest achievement reinforces his legacy as one of Africa’s most celebrated and influential musicians.

Eddy Kenzo’s star continues to shine brightly, bringing pride to Uganda and East Africa.

10 Men Uplifted by Women Surprisingly

Behind every successful man in the 21st century is a woman rolling her eyes, whispering, "You’re welcome." Whether its love, mentorship, or pure magic, these women uplifted their men, proving that behind every great man is an even greater woman.

1. Barack Obama

Barack Obama often credits Michelle Obama as his anchor and guiding star. Her wisdom, strength, and authenticity not only helped him navigate the political world but also inspired millions globally. Michelle’s role as his confidant and partner elevated his presidency into a symbol of love, resilience, and shared dreams.

2. Elon Musk
Elon Musk’s drive to colonize Mars might be interstellar, but his mother, Maye Musk, gave him the earthbound foundation he needed. A model and dietitian, Maye instilled values of resilience and ambition. She proved that a strong support system begins at home, nurturing the fearless innovator we see today.

3. Prince Harry
Prince Harry found renewed purpose with Meghan Markle by his side. Her advocacy for mental health, equality, and independence reshaped his life post-royalty. Together, they challenge norms and create impactful projects. Meghan’s influence transformed Harry from a rebellious prince to a vocal advocate for human rights and family values.

4. Sundar Pichai

Behind Sundar Pichai’s meteoric rise as Google’s CEO is his wife, Anjali. Her belief in him started when they were students. Anjali’s encouragement and patience enabled Sundar to focus on ambitious goals while maintaining balance at home, proving that love and support are key ingredients in any success story.

 

5. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson
Dwayne Johnson credits his ex-wife and business partner, Dany Garcia, for guiding his career transformation. From wrestling champion to Hollywood megastar, Dany’s sharp business acumen ensured his moves were strategic. Their unique partnership is proof that trust and collaboration can persist, even when personal relationships evolve over time.

 

6. Emmanuel Macron
French President Emmanuel Macron’s relationship with Brigitte Macron is as unconventional as it is inspiring. Brigitte, a former teacher, nurtured his intellectual curiosity and has been his closest advisor. Her unwavering support and wisdom have helped Emmanuel lead France with vision, redefining the boundaries of love and partnership in politics.

 7. Jeff Bezos

Amazon’s rise from a garage startup to global giant owes much to MacKenzie Scott. Jeff Bezos’ ex-wife was a key player in Amazon’s early strategy. Even after their separation, her philanthropy and success highlight how pivotal she was in shaping his journey, demonstrating the depth of her influence.

 8. LeBron James

LeBron James credits his wife, Savannah, as the stabilizing force behind his legendary basketball career. From high school sweethearts to power couple, Savannah’s quiet strength and loyalty ensured LeBron stayed grounded. Her role as his biggest supporter and family pillar allows him to dominate on and off the court.

9. Mark Zuckerberg
Mark Zuckerberg’s wife, Priscilla Chan, transformed his worldview. A doctor and philanthropist, Priscilla inspired Zuckerberg to focus on giving back. Their Chan Zuckerberg Initiative aims to address global issues, blending her compassion with his tech expertise. Together, they’re tackling challenges far beyond the scope of social media.

 

10. Jay-Z

Jay-Z credits Beyoncé for elevating every aspect of his life. Their iconic partnership has redefined modern celebrity culture. With Beyoncé’s artistry and Jay-Z’s business acumen, they’ve built an empire. More than collaborators, they’re soulmates whose shared vision has shaped music, fashion, and philanthropy, proving that power couples are unstoppable.

 

DJ KHALITO AND DJ CRAZYMIND SHUTDOWN! Oxford Sports Lounge!

Last Friday, Oxford Sports Lounge opened its doors like any other night—early birds trickled in, slow jams flowed from the speakers, and small talk filled the air. The mood? Casual. Groups whispered about business, last weekend’s failed plots (you know who you are!), and a healthy dose of weekly lugambo to spice things up. It felt like the calm before the storm—because what followed was nothing short of legendary.

At 9:30 PM, MC Mercy grabbed the mic, testing it with the confidence of a man who knows he’s about to bring the house down. Then, like a magician, DJ Khalito materialized, adjusted his gear, and disappeared into the Pece Stadium night for what we can only assume was a spiritual consultation with the gods of music. But when he returned and hit play, the room shifted. Slow head nods turned into rhythmic foot taps, and before long, the dance floor began to warm up as Khalito dropped bangers that made hips defy physics.

Then—plot twist! At precisely 10 PM, a swarm of stunning ladies swept into the venue, commandeering three tables like queens taking their thrones. Every head turned, and DJ Khalito, clearly inspired, switched to a set designed for royalty. Trust me, this wasn’t just a vibe; it was a moment. I couldn’t resist—I ditched my phone, ordered another Guinness Stout, and joined the room in full admiration mode.

By now, the Lounge was alive. Revellers grooved to the beats, while the bravest among us tried (and mostly failed) to shoot their shots. Enter DJ Crazymind at the stroke of midnight, flanked by an entourage of over 30 creative geniuses. Known for blending Acholitronix with global sounds, Crazymind didn’t just play music—he crafted an experience. He layered local vocals over international beats, weaving a soundscape that took us from the streets of Gulu to the clubs of London and back.

The crowd? Unstoppable. From South African amapiano to Nigerian Afrobeats and American hip-hop, the energy was electric. Even the walls seemed to pulse with life as Crazymind dropped mixes that felt like sonic adrenaline. It didn’t matter if you were a Gen Z skiller or a seasoned bend-over veteran—the music made everyone move.

And the surprises kept coming. The hype team—led by MC Mercy—kept the energy so high, even the Guinness-drinkers turned into dance floor warriors. The highlight? That jaw-dropping moment when Crazymind synced a local Luo chorus with a trap beat, leaving the crowd in awe. This wasn’t just a party; it was a cultural revolution.

As the clock ticked past 3 AM, revellers refused to leave, chanting for encores. Oxford Sports Lounge delivered a night so epic, people are still buzzing about it days later. Next Friday, Sakata Band from Kampala will take the stage, but honestly? The streets are already calling for DJ Crazymind, DJ Khalito, and MC Mercy to make a grand return.

If you missed this one, don’t make the same mistake twice. Tag your crew and reserve your spot—Oxford Sports Lounge is officially the heartbeat of Gulu nightlife.Shoutout to influencer Smartswizz for keeping the girls hot! and the beers ice-cold!

#ExtremeFridays #OxfordVibes #GuinnessAndGrooves #AcholitronixAnthems

 

Eezzy Teases Double Hits Release over Weekend: Dancehall or Hip-Hop?

Attention, music lovers! Eezzy, the Northern hitmaker, is about to make December twice as lit with not one, but TWO fire tracks dropping this weekend. Yes, you heard that right—double the beats, double the vibes, and probably double the dancing injuries (if you're as uncoordinated as me).

Now, the million-dollar question: are you ready for these musical gifts? Or better yet, which camp are you joining—the dancehall gang or the hip-hop crew? For the dancehall fans, one of the bangers, Wai Daba, features the ever-electric Kasita Karole. It's bound to set dance floors ablaze and possibly trigger impromptu twerk-offs at your favorite hangouts. Meanwhile, the hip-hop track? Well, that’s still under wraps, but word on the street is that it’s a lyrical knockout.

So, grab your best dancing shoes (or sneakers for you hip-hop heads), because Eezzy is bringing the heat. Whether you're whining to the beat or nodding your head like a lyrical connoisseur, this weekend is about to be unforgettable. Dancehall or hip-hop—which side are you on? Or are you smart enough to pick both and secure your spot as the ultimate music fan? 

Australia Bans Social Media for Teens under 16, Uganda is Watching

Australia has decided to ground its teens from the digital skies, passing a law that bans under-16s from social media without parental consent. Platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and Snapchat are now bracing for fines up to AU$49.5 million if they let the young’uns slip through.

The Tech Titans Clap Back
Meta thinks lawmakers fast-tracked this like an overdue school project. Snapchat says the law leaves “many unanswered questions,” but promises to cooperate (begrudgingly). TikTok, always a drama magnet, warns this could drive teens into the internet’s shady alleys—where no safety filters dare tread.

What’s PM Albanese’s Take?
Australia’s Prime Minister suggests kids ditch their phones for cricket bats and swimming pools. But even he admits enforcing the law might be as tricky as stopping a sneaky sip of Dad’s beer. Still, he’s all-in, declaring: "We’ve got your back, Aussie parents."

Execution Woes
Here’s the kicker: nobody knows how this will work. A trial starts in January, but the government won’t force platforms to ID users (phew). Critics like Senator Sarah Hanson-Young call it a clueless boomer crusade, claiming lawmakers don’t get how teens TikTok.

A Global Trendsetter?

Spain, France, and even the U.S. are eyeing similar moves, while China’s already throttling Douyin use for under-14s. Will Australia’s bold ban set the trend, or is this just another chapter in “Adults Trying to Understand the Internet”? Stay tuned—preferably after parental approval! 

Elon Musk's Starlink announces launch of direct-to-cell satellite internet worldwide.

A New Era in Satellite Connectivity

On January 2, 2024, Starlink launched its first six satellites with revolutionary Direct-to-Cell capabilities. This milestone marks a significant step toward bridging the gap between space-based infrastructure and everyday mobile communication.

Seamless Ground-to-Satellite Communication

Within just six days of the launch, Starlink successfully sent and received text messages between unmodified cell phones on the ground and its satellites using T-Mobile network spectrum. This achievement validated the system’s functionality and confirmed its readiness for broader deployment.

Eliminating Dead Zones

The Direct-to-Cell network aims to provide seamless connectivity, addressing dead zones that have long plagued global communication. By creating a space-based network that mimics terrestrial cell towers, Starlink ensures reliable access to text, voice, and data for LTE devices worldwide.

Text Services Today, IoT Tomorrow

The rollout begins with text services in 2024, followed by voice, data, and Internet of Things (IoT) capabilities in 2025. This phased approach allows Starlink to refine its systems and meet the evolving needs of users across the globe.

Engineering Marvels in Space

Developing a network that connects to unmodified cell phones required overcoming significant technical challenges. Starlink's satellites feature custom silicon, phased array antennas, and advanced software algorithms to ensure compatibility and efficiency.

Global Connectivity for All

With a vision to provide universal access, the Direct-to-Cell network extends Starlink’s mission of eliminating connectivity barriers. This innovation offers unprecedented access to communication services, even in the most remote areas.

Building on Proven Success

Starlink's track record includes deploying over 5,000 satellites and serving 2.3 million customers worldwide. The Direct-to-Cell network builds on this foundation, showcasing Starlink's expertise in rapidly scaling cutting-edge technology.

Pioneering the Future of Communication

The Direct-to-Cell initiative cements Starlink’s leadership in satellite-based communication. By addressing technical and regulatory challenges, it paves the way for a future where connectivity is not just a privilege but a global standard.

Okeng Born Town Strikes Again with Oyee An!

 
After 24 months and 5 days of silence (but who’s counting?), the legend Okeng Born Town is back with Oyee An! 

This track is soaked in December Lingala vibes, perfect for festive fireworks and beer-filled nights. Love might not have been kind to the man, but hey, heartbreak makes for the best dance tracks, doesn’t it?

For over a decade, Okeng has been the maestro of melodies that move us, whether in kafundas or swanky clubs. And Oyee An is no exception—it’s the kind of hit that makes even the grumpiest of Scrooges bust a move.

So, grab your party shoes and a cold one because this banger is here to claim its spot as the anthem of the season. Love may hurt, but Lingala heals, and Okeng Born Town knows just how to turn the tables. Dance floors, brace yourselves!

Uganda Law Society Faces Turmoil Amid Leadership Controversy

The Uganda Law Society (ULS) has plunged into a storm of controversy involving its president, Isaac Ssemakadde, after his provocative remarks targeted legal officials, including Director of Public Prosecutions, Justice Jane Frances Abodo. Ssemakadde’s comments, widely condemned as vulgar and misogynistic, have sparked outrage among the legal fraternity and Uganda’s Minister of State for Ethics and Integrity.

The ULS Council responded by suspending Ssemakadde and Vice President Anthony Asiimwe over misconduct allegations, including financial mismanagement. However, critics challenge the legality of the suspensions, accusing the council of bypassing constitutional processes. This action has deepened divisions within the society, with supporters viewing Ssemakadde as a reformist challenging entrenched systems, while detractors criticize his approach as unprofessional and detrimental to the society's image.

The crisis has far-reaching implications, from potential legal battles to strained relationships with donors critical to ULS’s free legal aid programs. Ssemakadde remains defiant, stating in a Facebook post:

"Reform disrupts the status quo and exposes hard truths. Let this be a call to demand better from our institutions and ourselves."

As the debate rages, the ULS faces a critical test of its governance, professionalism, and commitment to justice.

Disclaimer for Kamule Kumalo Blog

The content published on Kamule Kumalo is intended for informational and entertainment purposes only. While we strive to ensure the accuracy of the information presented, the views, opinions, and statements expressed in our articles do not constitute legal, financial, or professional advice.

 

Eezzy Denies Retirement, Hints at Passing the Torch

Hold your tears, Kumalians! Eezzy hasn’t hung up his mic—yet. In fact, the Tumbiza Sound hitmaker is on a roll that screams "legendary status." Over the past two years, Eezzy has transformed from a music star into a force of nature. 

From funding education for children across Uganda to launching entrepreneurial ventures, he’s been busy collecting blessings like they’re hit singles.

But here’s the plot twist: Eezzy is now turning his gaze to the next generation of artists who clawed their way from lockdown-induced despair to the bright stage lights. In a Facebook post that oozed wisdom and respect, Eezzy applauded the fresh talent for their grit, lyrical maturity, and ability to tackle critical issues. Who says Gen Z isn’t deep?

Even Zetive, a foundational Hit-maker who’s shaped many of these budding stars, chimed in with praise for Kamuzu Urban Nigga’s 2024 breakout. Zetive even dropped a cheeky hint about collaborations that made our playlists worth every replay.

As the Artist of the Year awards loom closer, the competition is fiercer than a freestyle battle. Mixola’s fans are shouting louder than a concert crowd, claiming their fave deserves the crown.

But with Eezzy’s nod to the new school, you can’t help but wonder if the OG is paving the way for a new ruler of the Kumalian charts.

One thing’s for sure: Eezzy’s not retiring—he’s evolving, and we’re all here for it!